My name is Daniel McBrearty. I am 53 years old. I was abandoned by my mother when I was a few months old. A while later I was taken to a foster family who cared for me (very lovingly) until I was about 5 or 6, after which I lived again with my father, sister, and stepmother.
Through much of adolescence and adult life I suffered from severe depression. I had a number of relationships, none of which lasted. In my 30’s (after another tough breakup) I realised that something was not right, and I began trying to find out what. Thus began a long personal journey and a search for answers.
These days (about 20 years on!) I am much, much happier than I was then. Although I still have the odd bad day, I can usually pick myself up quite quickly. (Back then I suffered depressive bouts which could last months or years and which could be quite destructive.)
This site started as me telling the story of how I came to recognise the connections between what I had been through and my emotional issues, and my personal observations on the nature of the trauma. (This part of the site is under the menu heading “A Deeper Look At Abandonment“.)
At first I only showed this to a few close friends. Then one day I started a Facebook conversation on the nature of depression – and discovered how many other people I knew had suffered, in various ways. It was quite a revelation.
I also discovered more recently that a good friend, a man of similar age, had similar problems. The exact circumstances of his life are quite different to my own – he was separated from his mother for a few months as a baby, because of an accident. However, when we discuss our histories, we recognise very similar feelings and experiences. (Curiously, we have both drawn a great deal of strength from music over our lives.)
This was partly what drew me to create this site. It gives a lot of comfort to realise that we are not alone – even though we may think that we are.